Category Stuff About Me

Sense of Adventure: Saying YES

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Cover of "Yes"

Cover of Yes

One of the things on my list of 40 things was to say YES more (right after saying NO more! Different reasons…).  Saying YES (to me) means being open to spontaneous adventures and experience and doing things outside my comfort zone.

Sunday my friend Sarah texted and asked if I’d like to come over and get my photo taken for a photo project to be exhibited at the Rochester Art Center.  I didn’t get ready in time but during a walk we found the photographer and it happened.  It wasn’t hard to say YES to having my picture taken but when the camera was walking towards me I did feel a little intimidated.  And it was an in-your-face-photo, so I thought he probably only got my eyes in the frame, but I guess the macro lens captured my entire face.

In Your Face

The photographer was asking random people and having a hard time getting people to say YES to having their photo taken so he was looking for people he knew to bring his numbers up.  Why would someone say NO to  having their picture taken?  Was it the thought of someone getting too close?  The thought of having it hanging on a wall outside of your home?

Well, I said YES and I’m excited to attend the opening of the exhibit tomorrow night*** and to see all of the other Rochester people who said YES.

Off to read!

*** I always write my posts the night before and set them to publish in the morning… so the art exhibit opening is TONIGHT – Thursday!  The exhibit runs for a while, but tonight is the opening night.  Just a clarification!

Sense of Humor: The Angry Dance

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Footloose (soundtrack)

Image via Wikipedia

I went to see Footloose opening weekend – the revamped version – and it was good!  Really good!  It was a lot of fun to sing along and tap our feet to the beat of the familiar tunes, watching a familiar storyline and some incredible new dancing.  I laughed, I cried.  It was a good time.

And it reminded me of this scene from the final episode of Season 1 of Flight of the Conchords – Bret’s Angry Dance.

That iconic scene in Footloose was kind of dorky the first time and pretty powerful the second time – and really funny when Bret does it.

Enjoy.

Off to read!

 

Sense of Self: What I know for sure…

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Jack-o-latern

Image via Wikipedia

I don’t like to be scared.

I never have.  I have vivid memories of older cousins creating haunted houses in the basement before Thanksgiving dinner (what’s up with that? couldn’t let go of Halloween?) and participating in hay rides with ghost stories and watching scary movies… none of them enjoyable to me.  I would participate (because I’m social that way) but it was never anything I looked forward to or enjoyed.  I remember going through the Haunted House at the MN State Fair one year and being rooted to one spot, refusing to move, as arms were reaching out to grab me.  How terrifying.

I’m so rational and grown up now (ha!) that I don’t have as many fears as I did when I was younger and irrational thinking could get the best of me.  But I still won’t enjoy scary movies or attending scary or risky events.

Halloween is coming up now, so talk about costumes and events is at the forefront.  I’m also not a big costume person, preferring to wear my own clothes and be comfortable rather than pretending to be someone else, so I haven’t dressed up dressed up for Halloween in a long time.  Last year I went as Facebook and simply carried around some tagboard with a hole cut into it for my profile picture.  It was fun to have people write on my wall all through the night.

Halloween 2010

Other years I put on black clothes and cat ears and call it good. Probably the last “costume” I wore was an old bridesmaid dress with a crown and sash proclaiming “Queen of Everything.”

This year I have choir on Halloween night, so I won’t even be home to dish out the goodies.  Who knows what the weekend will bring, but what I know for sure is that I will not be wearing a costume and walking through spooky forests looking for a fright!

Off to read…

A Sense of Connection: LaoTong

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Cover of "Snow Flower and the Secret Fan:...

Cover of Snow Flower and the Secret Fan: A Novel

Almost two weeks ago I went with my friend Cindy to see the movie “Snow Flower and the Secret Fan.”  We are both Lisa See fans and read this book in preparation of seeing the movie this summer… and then thought we’d be renting it (ala “Jane Eyre”) but it came to Rochester with an Independent Movie Series!  Yay!

We both agreed that it was a beautiful movie, even with the modern storyline which wasn’t part of the book.  The book tells the story of two girls who are matched to be LaoTongs, or Old Sames, at a young age.  Wikipedia and Lisa See (the author) describe LaoTongs in this way:

Lao Tong or Old Sames was a more rare and formal relationship between women and was exclusive and life-long. Women of suitable birthdays, ages, backgrounds and birth-signs would be paired this way in a bond of exclusive sisterhood that would last a lifetime and would survive marriage, child-birth and widow-hood. A Lao Tong relationship would be rarely renounced or broken. (Wikipedia)

“A laotong match is as significant as a good marriage,” Lily’s aunt explained. “A laotong relationship is made by choice for the purpose of emotional companionship and eternal fidelity. A marriage is not made by choice and has only one purpose – to have sons.” “Snow Flower and the Secret Fan” is the story of such a friendship. (Lisa See)

I haven’t been paired with an Old Same since birth, but I do have friendships with amazing women that have survived (ha!) marriages and children and distance.  I also see great value in creating meaningful relationships and maintaining connections with them.  After I read “The Girls from Ames” I set out to create a group of women that meets monthly to create a real-life network of amazing women, to learn from each other and support each other.  We are in our second year and our time together is something I look forward to each month!

The Chinese women sworn to be Old Sames used a secret women’s language – nushu – to communicate with each other.  We use Facebook, email, or phone calls to maintain connection with those who live a distance away, or we use walks, dinners, or girls’ night out to maintain and grow connections with those we can have more frequent contact with. No need to send servants between villages and households with secret language written on fans, but we can write letters to be delivered by the US Postal Service.

With the release of the DVD on 11/1, many book clubs are having LaoTong Nights – groups of women getting together to watch the movie and discuss their female friendships and the things they do (or can do) to maintain connections.  Below is the information they are encouraging people to think about and discuss as they think about their friendships and watch “Snow Flower and the Secret Fan.”

What would you add to the list below?  Have you ever planned a way to reconnect with someone you lost touch with?

Lily and Snow Flower had an intense friendship that lasted a lifetime.  Nushu helped them communicate and remain close, even in distance.  Everyone has that old friend they have known for a long time, yet find it hard to keep in touch.  Both get busy with their separate lives and don’t take the time to catch up with one another.  In honor of Snow Flower and the Secret Fancoming to Blu-ray and DVD November 1st, here’s a guide for keeping in touch with your besties, through whatever life may put between you.

Write Letters

There’s nothing like a handwritten letter to let someone know that you care and are thinking about them. Make a point of writing to your long-distance friend at least once a month, and giving them updates on what’s going on in your life, and asking what’s new in their life. If you’re so inclined, you can include photos or other small tokens of your friendship with your letters. This simple, heartfelt update will go a long way in making your friendship last.

Take a Trip Together

If it’s within both of your budgets, you and your bestie should take a trip together! Meet up in different places each year – places that are either meaningful to you both, or places that you two have always wanted to visit together. Have a weekend in Las Vegas, a week at the theme parks in Orlando, a glamorous trip to Hollywood, or a long, restful weekend in New England. Making new memories (or reliving old ones) will help keep your friendship vibrant.

Skype

One of the greatest inventions for modern day friendships is Skype. Making a weekly or biweekly “Skype date” can give you a chance to both talk to and see your long-distance friend on a regular basis. Best of all, Skype is free to use, even if you’re video-chatting someone internationally! Skype is great because, in addition to getting to hear your friend’s voice, you can also actually show them what’s new with you, or do something new together!

Start an Online Photo Album

There are so many different ways to share photos online these days, and you and your friend should take advantage of that! You can make a private album that only the two of you can access (you can do this on Facebook, PhotoBucket, etc.), and then you can both upload and comment on each other’s photos and keep up with what’s going on in each other’s lives.

Send Each Other Gifts

If you’re ever out shopping and see a little something that reminds you of your friend, or something you think your friend would love, why not send it to them? With USPS’ Flat Rate Boxes, you can send as much as you want to your long-distance friend for a small fee. Why not make a care package, filled with things you know they like (like homemade treats, or products specific to your area that they can’t get where they live)? If you exchange small gifts every few months, it will remind your friend that you’re thinking about them, and help you two stay friends forever.

Sense of Direction

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Direction

Well, it’s Friday and I blogged five days in a row.  I didn’t know if I’d get it done today, as I really feel under the weather.  It’s just a head/chest cold but makes thinking clearly a task.

So all I’m going to say about a Sense of Direction is that it is something that I have been thinking a lot about lately, probably obvious to all my friends and family.  What now?  Where do I want to be in the next few months?  What am I passionate about doing? What will this next journey in my life look like?

Deadra asked the other day if I had received my November O Magazine yet, and I have, but I am pretty lucky if I get the issue for the current month read in the current month, so I have just started October.  November’s issue is written for me, she says. 🙂  “Find your true calling.”  I can’t wait to start it!

Off to read!

Sense of Adventure

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RedBull cliff diving world series championship...

Image via Wikipedia

The fourth Satellite Sisters’ sense is adventure.  It’s hard to say if I’m adventurous or not… I don’t like to take risks with my life, so I will never climb a mountain or ride a motorcycle over parked school buses or run with the bulls in Pamplona or scuba dive with sharks.  I have gotten braver over the years, but I still prefer safety nets.

So my sense of adventure is satisfied by going out on a limb and singing a solo or attending a party where I won’t know hardly anyone or spontaneously agreeing to the next great adventure.

I’ll have to stretch myself here… 🙂

Next week.

Off to read!

Sense of Humor

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Garfield (character)

Ah, Garfield. Image via Wikipedia

I love comics.  Since forever.  When I was younger, like 10 or so, I used to cut out the Garfield comics from the Sunday funnies and put them in a scrapbook (can you say nerd much?).  I thought he was the best – so sardonic and pessimistic.  And that dopey Odie.  And poor John.  Ah.  I would read all the comics but would only cut out Garfield, for some reason. (And have you seen the website Garfield Minus Garfield? – hilarious!)

The comics are still my favorite section of the newspaper and I get a comics newsletter sent to my email every day.  I’ve gone through Far Side phases and Calvin & Hobbes periods.  Recently I’ve found Pearls Before Swine to be pretty witty.  I’ve purchased calendars and datebooks only for the comics (love the New Yorker!).  My favorite cocktail napkins and party invites feature Dolly Mama.  I love smart comics and classic comics.  I still cut them out when they are super good or pertinent to something happening in life.

A sense of humor is pretty important to me, I guess, and I especially love it when it doesn’t come at anyone’s expense!

What’s your favorite comic?  Do you read them every day?

Off to read!

A Sense of Self

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Found Words: Question Marks

Image by rosefirerising via Flickr

Wow.  So this isn’t going to be easy, is it?  A Sense of Self…  What does that mean?  I think that I have done a lot of self-reflection, especially lately, but at many different points in my life.  Lately I’ve been thinking about what the next part of my life will bring – new challenges and adventures, new people and opportunities. Although I am a person who likes to talk things out with others, I also am a person who trusts instincts and makes decisions on “what feels right.”  Is that because I have a good sense of who I am and what I can do?  Is that what good instincts are from?

When I googled “sense of self,” a webpage came up about how reading expands our sense of self.  I love reading so I read on… It goes on to say that when we are reading a book, we identify with the characters of the book and psychologically become part of their community.  We become vampires or students at Hogwarts or women of Biblical times.  And we can get as much satisfaction from these relationships as real-life relationships.  It comes from a desire to belong to a group.  Interesting to think about, eh?  I’ve always encouraged people to “feed their heads” with good things, because it would be awful to identify yourself with a group of racists or murderers.  Hmmmm…  Stuff to think about.

So where does this go?  I guess I’ll keep thinking about who I am and what I want and what I believe and will keep writing about it from time to time (on Tuesdays for a while).

And in the meantime, I found this on facebook from a few years ago:  25 Things about me.  I should update it – maybe that will be my assignment for this week – but it’s a glimpse into February 2009.  🙂

Off to read!

25 Things about Danette Grimsrud

by Danette Grimsrud on Saturday, February 14, 2009 at 4:12pm

1. I love lists. Some that I’m currently working on: books I want to read, movies I want to see, books I have read, movies I have seen. And see #2.

2. I turned 40 in 2008 and I had a list of 40 THINGS TO DO BEFORE TURNING 40. I didn’t complete the list (durn flood) but had a good time trying! Now I’m working on a list of 40 THINGS TO DO IN MY 40s. That gives me some time.

3. I remember weird things and forget lots of things.

4. I have a Christmas letter written that I haven’t sent out yet. Maybe this weekend? Yikes.

5. If given a choice, I will always choose eat out at a Chinese or Asian restaurant.

6. My daughter wouldn’t friend me at first and had to create a “family” facebook page so that she could join in all our fun. :-p

7. I love my job but it does have its heavy moments. Especially lately. I just want to bring kids home with me.

8. During my commute I mostly listen to podcasts. I’m very out of touch with the “pop” music scene right now. Podcasts I listen to regularly: Weekend America (last episode was 1/31 (sad sad), NPR Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, This American Life, The Satellite Sisters/The Chaos Chronicles. Others I hit now and again: anything Ricky Gervais, Oprah, iTunes book chat with authors, The Flight of the Conchords videocasts.

9. I can’t stand sports on television, with the exception of soccer. I think that the commentators for soccer don’t talk much so it’s just crowd noise. I haven’t watched a lot but during the World Cup enjoyed it a lot. Love to watch almost anything live. Although I think I’d never watch boxing or fighting.

10. I was a “Hot Box Dancer” in Guys and Dolls when I was 12.

11. I love to sing and sang a solo in a concert almost two years ago. It was the song, “Crossword Puzzle.”

12. I love crossword puzzles. But I bought a book of them recently that was just stupid. I was doing the NY Times puzzles for almost a year. Could complete a MONDAY puzzle without looking for answers. Even did a TUESDAY once. Never ever a SUNDAY.

13. I love to travel. I would love to plan trips for people.

14. I get great pleasure from sitting in a movie theatre and watching anything fun on the big screen. When I’m there I always wonder why I don’t do it more often. Last weekend was a two-movie weekend – pure bliss.

15. I have been to New York City three times. In 1991 or so with Lisa, in 1999 with Deadra and Marissa and in 2008 with Deadra. I could go back yearly, finances permitting, or even more often, just for a few days. It’s so fun to see the museums, the shows, the people. I don’t think I’d ever get tired of it.

16. I have 368 movies in my Netflix queue. Yikes.

17. I try to not eat at franchise restaurants, especially when I’m in a new place. It’s fun to hit the kitschy little places. My favorite was the little polka-dotted diner somewhere in western Minnesota on the way to Pierre. What a hoot.

18. David Letterman over Jay Leno any day.

19. The song with the highest play count on my iTunes is “Moon River” by Henry Mancini. Out of 5097 items.

20. I collect coffee cups from Broadway Shows. And music from Broadway shows. And programs from Broadway shows I’ve seen. And ticket stubs from movies. Nothing too big or that takes up too much space. Probably could say I collect books and movies and music too, but no snowmen or figurines or anything.

21. My favorite holiday is Thanksgiving. I love anything that celebrates gratitude.

22. I use firefox instead of internet explorer. (Now I’m reaching for things to say!)

23. I have a blog. About my book and movie habits. It’s a form of list-making.

24. I’ve gotten a lot better about getting rid of things. Seeing all your stuff underwater or soaked with water makes it pretty easy to see what is important to keep and what needs to be tossed.

25. This list has taken me entirely too long to write! Am gonna publish it already! No need to make your own list, as you either already have or aren’t going to! 🙂

 

A Sense of Connection

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Connections

Connections Image by bupowski via Flickr

Well, I completed the 40 Things challenge last week and used this past week to think about what is next.  I am going to try to blog Monday through Friday about the five senses outlined in the Satellite Sister’s book.  Set mini-goals or write about things that give me that Sense.

So it’s Monday and I’ll write about the Sense of Connection…

It’s ironic that Monday is also the day that I go “home” and sing in the choir that we started six years ago in my hometown.  I sleep at my parents’ home and connect with friends from home.  I love singing in this choir and the weekly connection we have through the music and our time together.  This fall I’ve also been walking with a friend after she’s done with work (or even walking on her lunch hour!), watching some hometown volleyball games, hanging out with my daughter and parents, and even helping out around the ponderosa (what we call my parents’ home).  Tonight I’m going to visit a friend I haven’t seen for a while and I’m happy that we’re getting together over a bottle of wine.  We both need it.  🙂

I had a busy week and weekend of connecting with friends and family.  Book club with friends from where I used to work, watching football (two games Saturday!), family meals, walks with friends, movies with friends, and meeting new friends.

I still have a few Thank-Yous to write from my birthday and a letter to write to a former student.  I used to be really good at writing letters and I’ve had it as a personal goal for a few years to stay connected with friends by sending cards and letters when I think of someone.  I have all the cute blank cards and stamps and return address labels needed so that is not an obstacle, but I don’t always do well and even emails aren’t always sent when they should be.  So it is an ongoing personal goal to maintain connections with people through phone calls, cards and letters.  Even emails.

What do you do to stay connected?  Do you have weekly check-ins with friends or family to maintain a connection?

Off to read!

A flood story – on the anniversary

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Rushford, MN, August 24, 2007 -- A FEMA repres...

My former neighbor's home - Image via Wikipedia

Below is a story that was written about Marissa and me after the flood.  College students were enlisted to interview people and to write the stories for a compilation, which I don’t believe has been published yet.  It’s hard to believe that it has been four years, as in some ways it seems like it was a LONG time ago.  Many things have changed… 

Danette Grimsrud’s description of herself as “not an alarmist” is one that has come to define her during and in the aftermath of the August flood.  This denotes the primary difference between Danette and her teenage daughter, Marissa.  Danette said, “I was expecting the best and she was expecting the worse.”  This became especially apparent when Marissa lay awake that night thinking of all that would be lost while Danette realized she “had no control” over the situation and could do no more than was possible.  Even when Danette was leaving the house, one of her first thoughts after grabbing her purse and camera was to take a basket of clean towels to keep them dry once they reached the evacuation site.

Later, this failure to submit to alarm and a lack of understanding about what was actually happening caused Danette to feel guilty for leaving without attempting to see if neighbors needed to be warned.  In fact, Danette was surprised to have woken up to the warnings at all.  “I never wake up; I’m a sound sleeper,” Danette said.  But, because it was cool and Danette likes the sound of rain, she uncharacteristically slept with the windows open that night.  Marissa considers this a sort of miracle.

When Danette did wake up to sirens, like many, she thought perhaps they were to indicate a tornado warning.  Then, she heard of the flooding inStockton, but “that just seemed unrelated to Rushford,” Danette said.  After Danette’s mom called unsure of what was happening, Danette decided to go back to bed.  Danette’s mom called a second time when she heard the announced evacuation order.  At this point, Danette woke Marissa and Inna, their former foreign exchange student who had returned to work in Rushford for the summer.  The three were told to evacuate to the High School, but once they reached the bridge they were unable to cross because a tree had fallen on the bridge.  Danette said, from here they “could see water going through the houses on the other side of the bridge.”

They drove the backroads out of Brooklyn, past many cars lining the road leading out of town and admittingly driving over washouts, to north Highway 43. They stayed at Larry Dahl’s house, the father of Danette’s friend Deadra, for the rest of the night,  drifting between sleeping and watching TV, but were unable to get a weather report.  At about 6:30 a.m., they lost power.  “Then we grilled toast and made coffee on the grill,” Danette said.  Shortly thereafter, Danette’s mom called, saying, “Your house is under water.”

“I didn’t even want to go see it,” Danette said.  “We had three feet [of water] on our main floor.”  Since they were not allowed into town, they stayed at Danette’s parent’s house, which had power.  Marissa and Inna first went back to the house in a canoe on Sunday afternoon, but they couldn’t get the door open to get into the house. Then Danette’s dad and brother got in the canoe with them and the men went in and grabbed Danette’s contact stuff, make-up bag, the guitar, a laundry basket of dirty clothes that was floating, and anything else Marissa and Inna told them to grab! The men were wearing waders – the water was still thigh deep.   Danette and Marissa went back to their home after a few days, but were only allowed to stay for about 15 minutes.

When they were able to assess the damages, it became apparent that everything in the basement would have to be thrown because the walls had collapsed.  Only a plastic tub of Barbies and one of T-shirts was saved.  On the first floor, “anything above three feet,” pictures on walls, books and home movies on shelves, as well as most photo albums were saved from water damage.  In addition, the dining room table that Danette’s grandparents  received as a wedding gift and a cedar chest that her dad built for her graduation were saved.

Danette and her family took Marissa to college the following Saturday after the flood, and brought Inna to the Cities to fly back to the Ukraine on Sunday/Monday morning. Luckily she had grabbed her passport and things when they evacuated! What a hassle that would have added to the week!  But as a result, they were not in town when a lot of the cleaning was going on.

In fact, it was Labor Day weekend, “almost two weeks after the flood,” Danette said before the house was stabilized well enough to start their own cleaning – including digging out the basement and supporting the house. She was amazed at all the people who continued to come to help with the house.  Marissa especially appreciated the help, saying, “they just came in and got it done, whereas it was harder for us because we were attached to everything and already emotionally strained.”  Danette enjoyed the fact that “they just wanted to talk to us, too – to hear our story.  They wanted to know who they were helping.”

Danette decided to sell her Rushford home and is now settled inRochester.  Danette said if Marissa had been “10 or 15 life would have been different; but she’s 19 so I just could make different decisions.”  But it was still “a hard decision to make,” she said.  “It was hard to think about leaving.”  The flood was “like a kick in the butt to do something different,” Danette said.